The wise man

Short Stories with lessons - How to overcome worries

People always come to the wise man, complaining about the same problems every time. One day, he told them a joke and everyone roared in laughter.

After a couple of minutes, he told them the same joke and only a few of them smiled.

When he told the same joke for the third time no one laughed anymore.

The wise man smiled and said:

“You can’t laugh at the same joke over and over. So why are you always crying about the same problem?”

Lessons from the story

1.Worrying won’t solve your problems, it’ll just waste your time and energy.

2. Pain is part of life.

HOW TO OVERCOME WORRIES

Distress, tensions, worries, doubts, anxieties, and difficulties are a normal part of life. It is natural to worry about a chronic illness, a disorder, debt, examination, an upcoming job interview. But “normal” worry becomes dangerous when it is continual and uncontrollable. Do you worry every day about “what ifs” and life issues? Or you find it difficult getting anxious thoughts out of your mind? and it is hurting your daily life, come with me.

"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”

– Leo F. Buscaglia

“There is a great difference between worry and concern. A worried person sees a problem, and a concerned person solves a problem.”

– Harold Stephen

What is worry?

Worry is the state of being anxious and troubled over actual or potential problems.

Worry also refers to the thoughts, images, emotions, and actions of a negative nature in a repetitive, uncontrollable manner that results from a proactive cognitive risk analysis made to avoid or solve anticipated potential threats and their potential circumstances.

Any individual can train his/her mind to stay calm and look at life from a more balanced, positive, and less fearful perspective.

Fear is quite different from worry, but both are related. A worried person will surely have a form of fear within himself.

If you read and apply these tips on how to overcome worries, you will be able to control your thoughts and worry less.

1. Understand that no situation is permanent

If an individual knows very well that no moment lasts forever, it will be possible to think about how to get out of the situation as soon as possible. 

Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create, think of what you have that motivates you to do more.

2. Analyze the major causes of the anxiety and map a solution.

Try to think of the main things behind your worries and think of a solution to the problems that created worries in you.

Make a list of all the solutions you can think of.  By so doing, you are addressing the situation from the right and positive viewpoint.  But do not get too emotional trying to get the perfect solution. Focus on the things you have the power to change, rather than the situation.

After you’ve assessed your options, make a plan of action to get out of your worrying state. Once you have a plan and you have started doing something about this problem, your nervousness will subside.

3. Learn to accept that some things are inevitable.

Life has so much in stock for its inhabitants. Every individual is liable to face tribulations or difficult situations in life. 

It makes no sense to worry about things or situations that you have no control over because there is nothing you can do about them.

Worrying about all the things that could go wrong doesn’t make life any more stable. Focusing or thinking always about the worst trials or ordeals that may occur will only prevent you from enjoying the good things you have in the present.

4. Write down your worries and  Choose a set time and place for worrying.

If you can't get rid of worrying quickly. Get a notepad or phone and make a brief note of your worries, and then continue about your daily activities. Remind yourself that you’ll have time to think about it later, so there’s no need to worry about it at the moment.

If you are still bothered about the issues, create a short time to go over your worry list, a maximum of 15 minutes. Avoid picking a moment just before your bedtime so that it won’t make you anxious just before bedtime. Allow yourself to worry about them, but only for the amount of time you’ve specified for your worry period. During your worry period, you’re allowed to worry about whatever is bothering you. As you assess your worries in this way, you’ll often find it easier to develop a more balanced perspective. 

5. Surround yourself with hopeful people

Get rid of friends  that are causing worries in your life. Surround yourself with friends who think positively. Move with people who contributes to a creative environment. This will build and  increase your positive outlook. A group of people talking negatively can infect every individual in that group with their negativity. You should avoid such group, join a circle that talk things up rather than down.

Negative things that worries can bring into your life:

This is not to frighten you but to let you know that you need to stay far away from worries. Constant worrying, negative thinking, and always expecting the worst can do the following to you;

1. It can take a toll on your emotional and physical health.

2. Restlessness; worries can leave you feeling restless and uncomfortable.

3. It can sap your emotional strength.

4. Worries can make it difficult to concentrate at work or school.

5. Worries can cause insomnia, headaches, stomach problems, and muscle pain. 

Finally, due to my strong belief in positive words, I will like to share with you 12 powerful quotes that will heal you of your worries.

“Our fatigue is often caused not by work, but by worry, frustration and resentment.”

_____Dale Carnegie

"Worrying is carrying tomorrow's load with today's strength- carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength"

_____Corrie Ten Boom

“I never worry about action, but only about inaction.”

_____Winston Churchill

"If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present."

_____Roy T. Bennett

“If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.”

_____Dale Carnegie

“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”

_____Erma Bombeck

"People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the burdens are attached to them."

_____George Bernard Shaw

"You're only here for a short visit. Don't hurry, don't worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way."

_____Walter Hagen

"Don’t waste your time in anger, regrets, worries, and grudges. Life is too short to be unhappy."

_____Roy T. Bennett

“A day of worry is more exhausting than a day of work.”

_____John Lubbock

...upward delivery

“Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith.”

_____Henry Ward Beecher

"If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever."

_____The Dalai Lama