Fela Durotoye; success Story and biography

Adetokunbo Olufela Durotoye is a business consultant, speaker and leadership expert. He is the Chief Executive Officer of GEMSTONE GROUP; a leadership development institution. A non-governmental organization with a distinct mandate to raise a generation of leaders that are empowered and motivated to operate with Nation excellence.

Fela durotoye; a business consultant, leadership expert and motivational speaker. How did Fela durotoye make it?

Just like you and I, Fela durotoye has gone through hard times. Life is a journey that everyone must travel, it is filled with ups and downs and some inevitable pains. Fela Durotoye is a man of vision that values growth. His success and achievements started from somewhere.

He once shared this as a post on his Instagram page. He shared a powerful throwback photo from when he and his wife walked down the aisle in 2001. He made it clear that their beginning wasn't a smooth sail.

The post says; our wedding (2001), we had 40 guests attending for obvious reasons. I got married to my wife(Tara Durotoye) in 2001, living in a one-room in Lagos. I was 30 years old and had started my firm V.I.P CONSULTING from my room; where I had a bed(covering a hole in my rug), a wastebasket and a chair.

My wife(Tara Durotoye) had to go to her parent's house every day to take a bath because she couldn't use our community toilet and bathroom. And that is where our dreams began(a one-room apartment).

We've been through so much and have come so far solely by the grace of God and a determined work ethic.

So wherever you might be in your life today, even if your life seems as bleak as this wedding picture of ours, know that God hasn't even gotten started with you. God bless you.

Fela Durotoye once works as a financial analyst at Ventures & Trusts Limited in 1992. He was the head of the customer service department at Phillips Consulting Limited in 1998. Fela started his firm; V.I.P Consulting Limited in the year 2000 which soon became notable in customer and human management in Nigeria. The firm was restructured and switched from a consulting firm to a social enterprise called Visible Impact Limited(V.I.L).

Fela Durotoye facilitates and speaks at management and leadership retreats across, within and outside Nigeria.

With a determined work ethic, Fela durotoye was able to position himself for greatness. In 2018, Fela Durotoye gave a speech to over 200 entrepreneurs at the inaugural Nigerian American Business Forum in Tampa Florida, where he shared the podium with Nigerian Stock Exchange chairman Abimbola Ogunbanjo, Media pioneer Biodun Shobanjo, former governor Peter Obi, senior senator Mohammed Shaaba Lafiagi, senator Ben Murray-Bruce, and technologist Ade Olufeko.

INTERESTING PART OF FELA DUROTOYE'S STORY

In December 2009, Fela Durotoye endorsed the urban renewal project tagged "Mushin Makeover". The project involved Bankole Wellington(popularly known as Banky W), Alibaba, Kate Henshaw, Omoni Oboli, Teju Babyface, Sound Sultan(late), TY Bello, Dj Jimmy Jatt, Omawunmi, Denrele, Dele Momodu, Tosin Bucknor, Stella Damasus, Tee A, Segun Dangote, Ebuka Obi-Uchendu among others, painting and calling for volunteers who can donate paints for the project. Young professionals donated free paint and were on hand to paint.

Fela Durotoye mobilized over 2,000 volunteers to paint 296 houses across 7 streets of the Mushin suburb of Lagos at no charge to the owners and residents of the buildings. In the course of the Mushin Makeover project, over 100 unemployed youths were trained by Berger Paints PLC in ‘The Art & Technique of Painting’. The youths went on to earn a living as painters as a result of the Mushin Makeover project led by Fela Durotoye.

HIS POLITICAL AMBITION

On February 22, 2018, he made his intention to run for the presidency in the 2019 Nigerian general election under the political party Alliance for New Nigeria. A coalition of 11 aspirants under the umbrella of the Presidential Aspirants Coming Together (PACT) unanimously elected Fela Durotoye as their consensus candidate. On Saturday, September 29, 2018, he emerged as the presidential candidate of the Alliance for New Nigeria (ANN) for the 2019 general elections.

While contesting for office, Fela said "it is not easy to run for office", but added that, "the best way to serve his nation's interest is to do so from the nation's highest office". After several months, he chose Khadijah Abdullahi-Iya to be his running mate(vice-president). She has been a successful social entrepreneur.

BIOGRAPHY OF FELA DUROTOYE

NAME: Adetokunboh Olufela Durotoye

PLACE OF BIRTH: Ibadan, Oyo State, Nigeria

DATE OF BIRTH: 12th May 1971

PARENT: Layiwola and Adeline Durotoye, both professors at the University of Ibadan.

EDUCATION: He attended Awolowo University of Ife Staff Children's School (1974 to 1981) and graduated to Moremi High School (1981 to 1986). Fela Durotoye proceeded to earn his Bachelor of Science Degree in Computer Science with Economics, as well as a master's degree in Business Administration (M.B.A) at Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife. He is an alumnus of the John F. Kennedy School of Government Executive Education program of Harvard University.

Fela Durotoye attended the High Impact Leadership for a better society program at the Yale University, he is also a certified leadership coach of the John Maxwell Team. In 2015, Fela completed the executive seminar program on strategy, innovation and governance at the Lagos Business school. This was followed by the supernumerary police training program at the Nigerian Police training college where he passed out with a distinction.

FAMILY LIFE: He married Tara Fela-Durotoye. Fela and Tara Durotoye are blessed with three children.

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The Struggles Of Our Life

Inspirational short stories with lessons - How to advance through adversity

Once upon a time, a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable and that she didn’t know how she was going to make it.

She was tired of fighting and struggling all the time. It seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.

Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire.

Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot and ground coffee beans in the third pot. He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to his daughter.

The daughter moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After twenty minutes he turned off the burners.

He took the potatoes out of the pot and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. He then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup.

Turning to her, he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?”

“Potatoes, eggs and coffee,” she quickly replied.

“Look closer,” he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noted that they were soft.

He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.

Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich flavour brought a smile to her face.

“Father, what does this mean?” she asked.

He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity (the boiling water). However, each one reacted differently. The potato went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.

The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.

However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.

“Which one are you?” he asked his daughter.

“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?”

Lessons from the story:

1. In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is how you choose to react to it and what you make out of it.

2. Life is all about learning, adapting and transforming all the struggles that we experience into something positive.

HOW TO ADVANCE THROUGH ADVERSITY

Challenges are bound to occur in our journey through life. You must be aware that no difficulty is permanent. For you to advance in times of adversity, you need to develop the willpower not to give up. That is the assured way to overcome, if you don't give up, you will define win.

9 STEPS TO OVERCOME ADVERSITY

When adversity occurs in an individual's life, most people tend to look for the escape route. Withdrawing from adversity is not the best step to take. Whenever disaster struck against any individual, all he/she will want to do is to find an escape and avoid the disaster. Such a response to adversity shows that the individual is weak or has not developed personally.

There are two responses to adversity

1. The first one is to exclaim, "Life is so terrible" or "why me Lord?" and most times weak individuals will say "but you don't understand what I am going through." The issue of adversity is a personal one, and that is why many feel their situation is worse than anyone else's.

2. The second one is to think positively "if I can't pay the price, then I don't deserve the prize". And then such individuals position the mind to find the perfect solution to such a situation.

We may feel like a situation is too terrible and there is no solution to it but that is not true. There are ways we can approach unavoidable situations in our life. You must refuse to be discouraged. Below are the steps to overcoming adversity:

1. SPEAK POSITIVELY TO YOUR SITUATION

Each time the fear of failing grabs you, speak positive words aloud to that situation. Here are some positive affirmations to repeat regularly:

" all is well"

"I will conquer"

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"

"This is not the end of my life"

" I am unstoppable"

"I shall not grow weary" "I am unstoppable" 

2. SELF MOTIVATION

At times, we become overwhelmed by the issues we face every day. And when stress is becoming much, it leads to depression. And to avoid breaking down in this situation, you have to brace up and encourage yourself. Take a look at the goals you set that gives you hope. Colourfully view the future and encourage yourself with what you can accomplish. It is not a bad thing to fall, you only need to get up and start moving again when you fall.

3. THINK OUT OF THE BOX

If you address the situation with an emotional state, it will keep getting worse. That is why you need to detach yourself from the situation first and then you can think of the way out. You will agree with me that it is easier to show how somebody else can change the situation they are in. You can spot the ways they can get out of a situation in which they found themselves since you are not emotionally attached to the situation, and it is easier to look at the problem from a different and better perspective.

This doesn't mean that you should throw away the box. You don't need to throw away the box, you only need to think out of it. To overcome adversity in your life, detach yourself from the situation and look at it from a different perspective. Treat it as another man's case and you will find a solution to the problem.

4. FIND OUT THE CAUSE

Most times, the hardship or problems we find ourselves in are the outcomes of our past actions. If you can investigate the source of the crisis, it will help you to get the right solution to the problem.  Because to change your situation, you need to change your thought and actions, Henry Ford said 'If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.' Wrong decisions are part of the cause of adversity in our life. You must try to figure out the cause of the problem and Look into how to change that situation. Find a way to face and surpass the challenges that are holding you back from success. Never blame other people, the system, or the government for your misfortune.

5. DEVELOP RESILIENCE

Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties. It refers to the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events. Being resilient does not mean you won't experience stress, emotional upheaval, and suffering. Being able to recover readily from misfortune, tragedy, setback, or any other form of adversity. You need to be willing to try again after every fall. Instead of thinking of quitting, map out the plan of how to get back on track.

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”

― Maya Angelou

"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

― Thomas Edison

6. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE

Words from other people can affect the way we see situations. If all you got around you are people who always see doom in every circumstance, it will affect your progress, it will either prevent you from moving forward or reduce your ability, making the situation look harder.

But to save yourself, never move with people who always see impossibilities in every situation.

"Resilience isn’t a single skill. It’s a variety of skills and coping mechanisms. To bounce back from bumps in the road as well as failures, you should focus on emphasizing the positive.” 

― Jean Chatzky

7. INVEST IN YOURSELF

This sounds like a proverb, right? You may be asking that what do I mean by invest in yourself? Investing in yourself is all about spending as little or as much money to develop yourself. 

It is the ability to gather enough information about ways you can move from point A to point B and finally reach your goal. You will surely overcome adversity if you can develop yourself for the result you desired. Here are ways you can invest in yourself:

• Discover yourself.
• Read good books.
• Read blog posts that deals with what you intend to improve on.
• Develop new skills.
• Never stop learning (That is the number one key to success, however, learn only things that are important to your journey)

8. LINK UP WITH SUCCESS

Adversity is a barrier to success, and the only way you can scale through is to find the 'ladder' or 'bridge' that will help you get to your dream. BELIEVING IN YOUR ABILITY is one of the bridges, having FOCUS is one of them, setting and accomplishing GOALS, making the right CHOICES, can be the bridge you needed.

When limits are broken, adversity vanishes. This means that when you can link up with success with the right ladder, you won't fall.

9. FIND A MENTOR

There are key steps to finding the right mentor. You need a mentor especially for rapid growth in your career/ business. A mentor will guide, motivate and even share experiences with you. The importance can never be overemphasized.

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The Young Female Reporter

The Young Female Reporter

Inspirational short stories with lessons; How to achieve your aim and desires

Source: Pexels

In 1995, I granted an interview with a newspaper in Singapore. The young female reporter was on time, and the interview got underway immediately. We sat in the lobby of a luxurious hotel, sipping coffee and discussing the purpose of my visit to Singapore. I was to share the platform with Zig Ziglar. He was speaking on motivation, and I was speaking on "The Secrets of the Rich."

"Someday, I would like to be a best-selling author like you," she said.

I had seen some of the articles she had written for the paper, and I was impressed. She had a tough, clear style of writing. Her articles held a reader's interest. "You have a great style," I said in reply.  "What holds you back from achieving your dream?"

"My work does not seem to go anywhere," she said quietly. "Everyone says that my novels are excellent, but nothing happens.  So I keep my job with the paper. At least it pays the bills. Do you have any suggestions?"

"Yes, I do," I said brightly.  "A friend of mine here in Singapore runs a school that trains people to sell. He runs sales-training courses for many of the top corporations here in Singapore, and I think attending one of his courses would greatly enhance your career."

She stiffened.  "Are you saying I should go to school to learn to sell?"

I nodded.

"You aren't serious, are you?"

Again, I nodded.  "What is wrong with that?" I was now back peddling. She was offended by something, and now I was wishing 11 had not said anything. In my attempt to be helpful, I found myself defending my suggestion.

"I have a master's degree in English Literature. Why would I go to school to learn to be a salesperson? I am a professional. I went to school to be trained in a profession so I would not have to be a salesperson. I hate salespeople. All they want is money. So tell me why| I should study sales?" She was now packing her briefcase forcibly. The interview was over.

On the coffee table sat a copy of an earlier best-selling book I wrote. I picked it up as well as the notes she had jotted down on her legal pad. "Do you see this?" I said pointing to her notes.

Source: Unsplash

She looked down at her notes.  "What," she said, confused.

Again, I pointed deliberately to her notes.  On her pad, she had written "Robert Kiyosaki, best-selling author." "It says 'best-selling author,' not best 'writing' author." Her eyes widened immediately.

"I am a terrible writer. You are a great writer. I went to sales school. You have a master's degree. Put them together and you get a 'best-selling author' and a 'best-writing author."

Anger flared from her eyes. "I'll never stoop so low as to learn how to sell. People like you have no business writing. I am a professionally trained writer and you are a salesman. It is not fair."

The rest of her notes were put away, and she hurried out through the large glass doors into the humid Singapore morning. 

At least she gave me a fair and favourable write-up the next morning.

As narrated by Robert T. Kiyosaki (Author of Rich Dad Poor Dad)

Brief Biography: Robert Toru Kiyosaki (born April 8, 1947) is an American businessman and author. Kiyosaki is the founder of Rich Global LLC and the Rich Dad Company, a private financial education company that provides personal finance and business education to people through books and videos.

Lessons from the story

1. Be open to learning

2. Don't be offended by good advice, rather think about the lessons

3. Great talent is not enough, learn as much as you can.

How to achieve your aim, goals, and desires

Source: Unsplash

Everything in life is all about the decision. If you win, it is as a result of your decision. And if you lose, it is the outcome of your decisions as well. Read on How-to- be-more_productive

1. Be teachable: If you want to be successful, you must keep growing. The best way to achieve your aim is to make yourself a continual learner. ''It is what you learn after you know it all that counts" ___John Wooden 
2. Build a great interest in learning things that will help you achieve your aims: Learning is not an activity that has a climax, it Is a lifelong pursuit. Your ego is the first thing you need to deal with if you ever want to be teachable. Feeling superior will never help matters because there is a thing you can learn from everyone whether young or old. Pride leads to a loss of desire to learn and an unwillingness to change. Pride often makes a person unteachable. And if you ever want to accomplish your aim, you must become teachable. Learn to listen to instructions, listen more than you talk. Listen openly for the truth, do not act defensive when criticized. never skip the learning process. 
3. Be disciplined: Discipline can be defined as making yourself do something when you could be doing something more pleasant. Start by taking small activities to make things better. Then you can be increasing the speed as you go on. Do the things that hurt you less, so as not to feel discouraged at first. Push yourself into discomfort a little bit, so you can get better at this over time.

   

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4. Develop the habit of following decisions promptly: Don't try to back up your mistakes with a formidable array of excuses. A disciplined person won't neglect any issue that needs attention. "Discipline is doing what you really don't want to do so you can do what you really want to do." ___Jeff Fisher

   

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5. Work on your mindset: Make personal development a priority for yourself. This may take a little time because every individual is a product of nature and nurture. The beliefs and notions that every individual grew up with will surely affect the mindset. Your hands will only reach the things that you believe is possible. Doubts and false ideas can prevent anyone from achieving his aim. 

   

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6. Look at issues with a positive perception: Don't be an agent of doom. Instead of talking about why it cannot be done, think of ways it can be done. Your mind is the greatest tool that can help you achieve your aim. Work more on feeding it with information that will make it grow from a chicken mindset to a lion's mindset. Picture whatever you want in your mind and back it up with steadfast faith. The first determinant of your success is the mind. Once you can overcome the negative of your desire, you are 99% to getting it.
7. Be hungry for more: The greatest threat to being all you could be is satisfaction with who you are. Back to the story above, the young female reporter said "...so I keep my job with the paper, at least it pays the bills." It shows clearly that her desire to become a bestselling author didn't consume her. She just wants to play it safe. Although she was a great writer she lacks the right things to move to the next stage. She said, "everyone says that my novels are ex excellent, but nothing happens." If she wants something to happen, she must have a burning desire to achieve her aim. And if you have previous achievements, don't rely on your laurels. "Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying" ___Roy T. Bennett

   

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8. Be specific: Let your aim or goals be clear. Don't say, "I just want to make it." Pinpoint the exact thing you want. The goal statement should indicate what should be accomplished. It should be phrased using action words like "sell," "save, " "create," "build," "implement,"). If the goal is measurable and specific, you can determine if you have accomplished it. If the goal is accomplished, the project is a success. Suppose your objective is to raise capital for your proposed business. An example of a specific goal to help you meet this objective is: "I will save 240 dollars in two months by saving 4 dollars every day for 60 days.
9. Have a definite plan and deadline: You need to map out the exact way you want to do it. The step by step guides should be written down. And most importantly, create a deadline for that plan. Procrastination is one of the greatest causes of failure. Most times, it is not a lack of knowledge or skill that causes disappointment. It is a lack of focus and inability to make a prompt decision.

   

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10. Persist: It is pertinent to understand that despite your great courage and hard work, you may need to 'refire.' The exact result you desire may not appear immediately. That should never be an excuse to stop shaking the tree of life. Persist and you will surely get down the fruit unheard of. If you keep trying, you will learn, grow and as well be whatever you want to be. If Micheal Jordan had stopped at the sight of failure when he first attempts basketball, He won't be noticed or ever called a great basketball player. He said;

"I can accept failure, everyone fails at something but I cannot accept not trying" ___Micheal Jordan

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The tricky Donkey

The Tricky Donkey

Inspirational Short Stories with lessons: How to improve and grow personally to be more productive

A salt seller used to carry the salt bag on his donkey to the market every day. There was a stream they have to cross on the way to the market.

One day, the donkey suddenly tumbled down the stream and the salt bag also fell into the water. The salt dissolved in the water and hence the bag became very light to carry. The donkey was happy.

Then the donkey started to play the same trick every day.

The salt seller came to understand the trick and decided to teach the donkey a lesson. The next day instead of salt, he loaded a cotton bag on the donkey.

Again it played the same trick hoping that the cotton bag would become more lighter.

But the dampened cotton became very heavy to carry and the donkey suffered. It learnt a lesson and didn’t play the trick anymore after that day, the seller was happy about it.

Lessons from the story:

1. Luck won’t favour always.

2. Do not avoid responsibilities with tricks, rather be productive.

There are several Individuals out there pretending as a beggar, most of them have a healthy body, they are not a handicap, they just chose to be a beggar and survive life with tricks. The reason why most of these set of people engage in such trick is their laziness and inability to discover that they are powerful and can dominate their world. Most people act foolishly when they are pitied. A person who always expect people to pity him or her will likely be unproductive. And once laziness becomes part and parcel of an individual, it becomes hard for that individual to become better or productive.

Another category of people who are also suffering from laziness are those who avoid what needs to be attended to in their lives. Busy people are often the laziest, they are too busy to work on themselves. They are busy with their work, they fail to create time to work on their personal development. They stay busy as a way of avoiding something they do not want to face. They often know that something important needs to be attended to in their lives, but they prefer to stay busy as a way of avoiding it. That is the most common form of laziness. An attitude of unwillingness to change. They failed to attend to issues in their lives. They prefer to be busy watching TV, playing snooker, or even at work rather than working on themselves or increasing the quality of their lives.

Another set of unproductive people are those who feel entitled. This type of people is just like those who pretend as beggars. Theirs is done in another way. They often call several people who are close to them for support. They ask for a share of what doesn't belong to them, but they rather see it as a right. They justify themselves with words like "he is my uncle, I can ask whatever I want from him" "she is a sister to me, there is nothing wrong if she helps me." And most of the time, if the individual they looked up to was unable to help them, they see that person as wicked or not generous.

Productivity is commonly defined as a ratio between the output volume and the volume of inputs. In other words, it shows how efficient a person is, compared to the opportunities and materials an individual has at his disposal. It is the quality, state, or evidence of being able to generate, create, enhance, or bring forth maximum value.

11 activities that can make you more productive

Have you ever asked yourself that how can I be more productive? How can I improve as an individual?, what do I need to do to be more valuable and creative?

“Productivity is being able to do things that you were never able to do before.”___Franz Kafka

How To Improve As An Individual

Our lives are a reflection of our habits more than our education. You need to make a habit out of self-improvement. Engage yourself daily in activities that contribute to your growth. Self-development is an art in itself, it is a continual process. It takes a lifetime of practice to master. The following are effective ways in which you can improve as an individual.

1. Research about the aspect of your life you want to improve: This is the first and crucial step. It is important because you will be able to select books, pieces of training, and the kind of materials you will need. You will be able to get clues of how to get started. Do you want to get better at a certain skill? or you want to be more confident and productive? Research about it to know the pieces of training or books that will be most beneficial.
2. Get the useful materials: Depending on the area of your life you want to improve on. Source for the materials that will be needed. There are books upon books that you can study. This generation is so blessed that you can get as much information you need as fast and easy as possible. Ensure you take notes as you access these materials. Get a notepad and pen for this special activity. Taking notes alone is not enough, you must take action too.
3. Find an accountability partner or people to train with: Self-improvement is more effective when it is done with others who are competent. Spend time with people who are working on similar things as you, and you'll find yourself cultivating new good habits at a faster rate than trying to do it all alone. Are you learning to play an instrument? Join other people who are doing the same and you will learn it faster and better.
   
   
   
4. Submit yourself to a mentor: A mentor is a person who has professional and life experience, who voluntarily agrees to help a mentee develop skills, competencies, or goals. A mentor is also an advisor and role model who is willing to invest in the mentee's personal growth and professional development. Most of the time there is an exchange by working in some way for or with them.
5. Reflect and measure your progress: Evaluate and see how far you have gone. Compare the previous state to the current state. No matter how intangible the thing you are working on is, you have to find some way to measure your progress. In such a way you'll know if you are progressing or not.
6. Celebrate/punish yourself: If you notice that you are progressing, celebrate yourself. You can decide to buy yourself your favourite drink. Relax and enjoy it at that moment. And if you fail to carry out the daily challenge, create a punishment for yourself, let your mentor or accountability partner hold you responsible.
7. Sincerity matters a lot: Making a decision is far easier than carrying it out. No amount of talking about it will ever initiate true change. Avoid the use of the word "I WILL" Take an immediate step and be true to yourself. Don't Deceive yourself by buying self-development books and leaving them on the table without opening them. No amount of talking will bring about change or growth, ACTION is what counts.
8. Set goals: Write clear goals about this new skill or habit you want to form down aim in your diary or journal. You can write it on a piece of small paper too and fix it beside your bed. Ensure it is not placed at a hidden place, paste it where it is easier for you to see. You must put in mind the rule of goal setting too. Your goals must follow the SMART rules.S- SPECIFIC, M- MEASURABLE, A-ACHIEVABLE, R-REALISTIC, T-TIME-BOUND
   
   
   
9. Select role models: We human beings tend to be motivated when we see others who have done what we intend to do. It is much easier to accomplish a challenge that someone else has been through. Look up to people who are a symbol of success concerning the kind of thing you want to improve on. Read about them, learn their ways of doing it and approach that aspect in your unique style. The aim of selecting a role model is just to motivate and inspire you, not to be exactly like them. Everyone has his unique style.
10. Be consistent: Don't act like a pendulum bob, swaying from one side to the other. Focus on one thing at a time and rigorously work it out into success. Be consistent, avoid having a long break in between sessions of your practice. Involve yourself regularly and dedicate yourself to getting a massive result.
    
    
    
11. Know when to relax a bit: It is not advisable to overwork yourself. Let the growth process consume you but don't let it finish you. Remember Rome wasn't built in a day. Break down your goals or aim into steps that are achievable at a go. If you are just starting, go with less speed and as you master the new skill or attitude, then you can move with full speed. I wish you the best, cheers to your life of productivity.

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 The wise man

Short Stories with lessons - How to overcome worries

People always come to the wise man, complaining about the same problems every time. One day, he told them a joke and everyone roared in laughter.

After a couple of minutes, he told them the same joke and only a few of them smiled.

When he told the same joke for the third time no one laughed anymore.

The wise man smiled and said:

“You can’t laugh at the same joke over and over. So why are you always crying about the same problem?”

Lessons from the story

1.Worrying won’t solve your problems, it’ll just waste your time and energy.

2. Pain is part of life.

HOW TO OVERCOME WORRIES

Distress, tensions, worries, doubts, anxieties, and difficulties are a normal part of life. It is natural to worry about a chronic illness, a disorder, debt, examination, an upcoming job interview. But “normal” worry becomes dangerous when it is continual and uncontrollable. Do you worry every day about “what ifs” and life issues? Or you find it difficult getting anxious thoughts out of your mind? and it is hurting your daily life, come with me.

"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”

– Leo F. Buscaglia

“There is a great difference between worry and concern. A worried person sees a problem, and a concerned person solves a problem.”

– Harold Stephen

What is worry?

Worry is the state of being anxious and troubled over actual or potential problems.

Worry also refers to the thoughts, images, emotions, and actions of a negative nature in a repetitive, uncontrollable manner that results from a proactive cognitive risk analysis made to avoid or solve anticipated potential threats and their potential circumstances.

Any individual can train his/her mind to stay calm and look at life from a more balanced, positive, and less fearful perspective.

Fear is quite different from worry, but both are related. A worried person will surely have a form of fear within himself.

If you read and apply these tips on how to overcome worries, you will be able to control your thoughts and worry less.

1. Understand that no situation is permanent

If an individual knows very well that no moment lasts forever, it will be possible to think about how to get out of the situation as soon as possible. 

Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create, think of what you have that motivates you to do more.

2. Analyze the major causes of the anxiety and map a solution.

Try to think of the main things behind your worries and think of a solution to the problems that created worries in you.

Make a list of all the solutions you can think of.  By so doing, you are addressing the situation from the right and positive viewpoint.  But do not get too emotional trying to get the perfect solution. Focus on the things you have the power to change, rather than the situation.

After you’ve assessed your options, make a plan of action to get out of your worrying state. Once you have a plan and you have started doing something about this problem, your nervousness will subside.

3. Learn to accept that some things are inevitable.

Life has so much in stock for its inhabitants. Every individual is liable to face tribulations or difficult situations in life. 

It makes no sense to worry about things or situations that you have no control over because there is nothing you can do about them.

Worrying about all the things that could go wrong doesn’t make life any more stable. Focusing or thinking always about the worst trials or ordeals that may occur will only prevent you from enjoying the good things you have in the present.

4. Write down your worries and  Choose a set time and place for worrying.

If you can't get rid of worrying quickly. Get a notepad or phone and make a brief note of your worries, and then continue about your daily activities. Remind yourself that you’ll have time to think about it later, so there’s no need to worry about it at the moment.

If you are still bothered about the issues, create a short time to go over your worry list, a maximum of 15 minutes. Avoid picking a moment just before your bedtime so that it won’t make you anxious just before bedtime. Allow yourself to worry about them, but only for the amount of time you’ve specified for your worry period. During your worry period, you’re allowed to worry about whatever is bothering you. As you assess your worries in this way, you’ll often find it easier to develop a more balanced perspective. 

5. Surround yourself with hopeful people

Get rid of friends  that are causing worries in your life. Surround yourself with friends who think positively. Move with people who contributes to a creative environment. This will build and  increase your positive outlook. A group of people talking negatively can infect every individual in that group with their negativity. You should avoid such group, join a circle that talk things up rather than down.

Negative things that worries can bring into your life:

This is not to frighten you but to let you know that you need to stay far away from worries. Constant worrying, negative thinking, and always expecting the worst can do the following to you;

1. It can take a toll on your emotional and physical health.

2. Restlessness; worries can leave you feeling restless and uncomfortable.

3. It can sap your emotional strength.

4. Worries can make it difficult to concentrate at work or school.

5. Worries can cause insomnia, headaches, stomach problems, and muscle pain. 

Finally, due to my strong belief in positive words, I will like to share with you 12 powerful quotes that will heal you of your worries.

“Our fatigue is often caused not by work, but by worry, frustration and resentment.”

_____Dale Carnegie

"Worrying is carrying tomorrow's load with today's strength- carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength"

_____Corrie Ten Boom

“I never worry about action, but only about inaction.”

_____Winston Churchill

"If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present."

_____Roy T. Bennett

“If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.”

_____Dale Carnegie

“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”

_____Erma Bombeck

"People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the burdens are attached to them."

_____George Bernard Shaw

"You're only here for a short visit. Don't hurry, don't worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way."

_____Walter Hagen

"Don’t waste your time in anger, regrets, worries, and grudges. Life is too short to be unhappy."

_____Roy T. Bennett

“A day of worry is more exhausting than a day of work.”

_____John Lubbock

...upward delivery

“Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith.”

_____Henry Ward Beecher

"If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever."

_____The Dalai Lama

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