Answers to questions on how to develop, create and see value around you.

The aspect of life this question and answer section covers are self-discovery and improvement, finance, business, career, and relationship.

The answers are solutions that are easy to follow. Books that carry the solution are recommendations to some questions. I am sure you will find this piece very interesting.

These are questions from real people, their names were exempted for confidential reasons.

Wondering where the questions came from? These are questions from people during the question and answer section with Sam Adeyemi on Facebook, consultation sections and so on. Most of the answers are provided by sam Adeyemi and some by Peter Oyebode with other amazing personalities. Take what you need and apply the answers where applicable.

Your personal questions can be directed to Peter Oyebode

QUESTION: How do I build consistency in learning a new skill?

ANSWER: Do something daily in that area for 30mins - 1 hour.

QUESTION: How can I make savings?

ANSWER: Avoid debts and start a side hustle.

QUESTION: I thought of venturing into pure water distribution from factory to homes. But I am lost about how to develop a clientele base without losing them to the factory?

ANSWER: Why not start by looking for clientele first. Start with some research. Go out and ask if people even want this service. No guesswork. Take the uncertainty out.

QUESTION: I trade forex and crypto but recently I ran into financial dept, it got so bad that I could barely afford to feed. How do I get out of this precarious moment?

ANSWER: Investing is risky, maybe slow down a little.

QUESTION: I really need to know how I can be able to meditate more and remember whatever I read?

ANSWER: Read one chapter a day and memorise one verse. Start slow. Write it on a stick now and look at it every morning too. Until it sticks.

QUESTION: I have a passion for the sales and production of organic       products but my parents did not agree. How can I persuade my parent to learn it?

ANSWER: You come to an agreement with them. Your parents are probably fearful of something they do not understand. Show them the benefits and possibilities and show them your plans on paper.

QUESTION: The happenings in the country landed me in so many business debts that... Seriously it's getting into my head...my creditors are on my neck and I'm stuck...don't know what next to do seriously.

ANSWER: Speak to all your creditors. Work out a payment plan with them. Don't take any more loans.

QUESTION: I want to venture into the business of poultry farming but the recent bird flu attack made me scared. What can I do sir?

ANSWER: Speak to someone in that business currently, get some advice. You could call poultry investment companies and ask questions.

QUESTION: When you have foresight, ideas and encouraging values and could see it will breakthrough, but you are not just propelled, or internally no vibes to start up, sir how could one overcome this?

ANSWER: Set your goals, look at them every day. Ask yourself what am I doing right now or is what am doing right now moving me towards my goal. Be honest with yourself. If you are waiting for vibes you may never start anything tangible. Don't let fear or excuses dominate your mind. Break down your goals into daily achievable tasks daily. All the best.

QUESTION: I am running a startup company. A thrift business.

How do I get investors to expand our services?

ANSWER: Collaborate with someone or partner with someone. Investors have to see that your business is doing well with huge potential. If investors can't see this, they will not be interested. Make sure your business records and systems are excellent. Networking is important too. You might need to do some online research here.

QUESTION: What is the system to developing the value within myself?

ANSWER: Identify your strengths. Speak to people around you, let them give you feedback. Take time with yourself and write down what you love doing, what you want, set your goals and go for it. Seeing value in yourself starts from within. Self-esteem is highly important. Discard anything eating at your self-esteem.

QUESTION: How can I go into developing without having any skill?

ANSWER: Learn a skill. Use Youtube, it's free.

QUESTION: In a bid to keep making myself valuable, I've taken and still taking more courses. I'm currently running a PhD program but I still feel like my value is not visible enough. I sometimes feel like a cornered/hidden asset. How do I market myself and make people see more of this value, and at the same time get good income from this?

ANSWER: In a need to become a valuable person in society, you have to solve problems. Attend to the problem of your society. Dangote is popular only because he is attending to the needs of Nigerians and the other countries in the world. Analyze the needs of your society then strategically find ways to meet them.

I believe you have a lot of potentials in you that might solve people's problems. Apart from acquiring educational knowledge, the practical aspect of you should be felt by the society. That is what matters in the world.

Write out what you like doing, display your knowledge in a practical sense. Also, do some research on the challenges people are facing today, look for the one you have a solution for and make it available for people to see.

From there you will begin to see yourself impacting others. Of course, your impact will definitely bring income to you.

QUESTION: As an entrepreneur, I ought to be dispensing value always by putting out valuable content. 

How do I strike a balance between giving out free value and selling valuable content?

Also, how does one become highly sought after in his niche/field of specialisation?

ANSWER: The essence of giving free value is to attract a certain type of audience in your niche.

According to the law of reciprocity, if you give, expect to receive.

Your goal should be to give more value and build your audience, then you can monetize your audience by selling a product.

QUESTION: I am a business lady, and I have a restaurant in Abuja. My dad died and I stopped. I am now in Lagos working to save up money to start again, WHENEVER I HAVE THE MONEY, SOMETHING WILL HAPPEN. IF THE MONEY DIDN'T FINISH, THE PROBLEM PROBLEM WON'T GO. I AM TIRED. What will I do because I am so so tired of everything?

ANSWER: I think you already created a myth and pattern in your head and you need to lose it. That problem is exactly the way you see it.

Go again and clear off the myth. That is when you have money to start again.

QUESTION: I am a teacher in a school preparing to go for my masters, I heard of adding value, upgrading and so on.

How do I add value and upgrade myself spiritually, financially and otherwise?

ANSWER: To add value to yourself is simply to add knowledge to yourself. Be loaded and that is how you will be needed.

The value you are to add here is for you to solve problems with the knowledge you have acquired academically. For example, if you are teaching English in school, you can start by letting people know the importance of good communication. Not everybody knows how to communicate effectively. You can teach people what it takes to become a good public speaker. Write it as an ebook and sell it.

QUESTION: I am currently an apprentice at a fashion house and just graduated(2020). I am looking for how to raise capital and gain entrepreneurial skills. Any advice?

ANSWER: Go and work under someone. Get paid for your services, safe or join a cooperative, after six months you will be granted a loan to start up your business.

QUESTION: How can u discover my talent and develop it?

ANSWER: Read, 'NOW DISCOVER YOUR STRENGHTS' By Marcus Buckingham

QUESTION: What about marriage issues?

ANSWER: Read books on marriage, I recommend

• MEN ARE MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS By John Gray
• THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES By Gary Chapman
• SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE By Stephen Covey

QUESTION: How can I develop and monetize my gift of counselling and life mentoring?

ANSWER: Get some video testimonials from people you have helped. Use social media to offer free content daily to people and YouTube too. Build a following. Start building your email list, give something for email addresses. Improve your online presence and network with people in that space. Start doing something. You can open an online counselling platform. Do some research too on how this is done.

QUESTION: How can I multiply my values, sir?

ANSWER: Grow. You need to learn new skills or improve the skills you already have to the highest possible level.

QUESTION: How can one be successful as a man?

ANSWER: To be successful as a man, you need to;

• Be responsible
• Get a vision
• Be disciplined

QUESTION: How can one build a good relationship with his partner and also with God?

ANSWER: To have a good relationship with partner and God;    

• Always seek first to be understandable
• Then express yourself to be understood
• And always find a third alternative when there is a difference in a stand.

QUESTION: How can I control my mindset?

ANSWER: Watch your circle of friends, the songs you listen to, the books you read, the television programs you watch and people you listen to.

QUESTION: Is it possible to start a business with capital as low as thirty thousand?

ANSWER: Yes, you can start with very little. Look at your skills and monetize them. Test the market, see if people want your services. Go for it.

QUESTION: I have in mind to start a business but am always afraid of failing. What can I do?

ANSWER: You need a right mindset to succeed in business. Business is built, it is not an investment where you put your money and go to sleep, wait for your ROI every month. Business requires your attention, develop yourself more around your business, give it time while you get better and also get a mentor that will guide you. A lot of persons don't see the need for mentorship but ask those that are successful today, they will tell you who their mentor is.

QUESTION: I just got admission to school and my mum that is willing to sponsor my education has passed on since last year. What can I do about this since there is no helper again and education really matters to me?

ANSWER: First of all, calm yourself down. Find a skill and learn, start your own, save money and pursue your education.

QUESTION: How do I relate with people, I mean having a long-lasting relationship with people?

For example, I don't have any special friends, I see everyone like "they are human beings" "don't trust them"

ANSWER: Maybe you have been hurt by someone you trusted. But this feeling will go off if you start associating yourself with people that share the same vision as you and work with them to achieve a common goal. You will form friendships from there.

QUESTION: I discovered I have so many creative ideas both in and out of my field but I don't know how to go develop the ideas outside my field, how to sell these ideas or invest in them?

ANSWER: Do some research on how ideas work. There are tons of books on the topic. You can check out;

1. 8th Habit by Stephen Covey
2. 360-degree leader by John Maxwell 
   
   
   

Or you check out Richard Branson, Warren Bemmis or Peter Drucker's books. There are so many management, leadership and business books out there.

Before deciding to purchase or read any book, make sure the said author has results in that particular aspect of life.

QUESTION: I started off with sciences, when I got admission into the school of nursing, my admission was sold. I got angry and change my course to business administration. I finished feeling very empty, I went ahead to do postgraduate in education because I discovered I enjoyed teaching, wrote the teachers exam and passed but all the jobs I am getting can barely feed me. I am at a crossroads of what I should do, what is the way out?

ANSWER: You made it clear that you enjoyed teaching, you need to keep the passion burning and with time you will find a better teaching job.

Keep doing your best and think of ways to start a business around education.

You can add a side business also to meet your financial needs, look around you, find what people need most am start selling them.

QUESTION: I am having a big challenge keeping my business going in my absence. I am not afraid of delegating but people don't deliver as much value as I would if I was present. So I am afraid of leaving the business to run itself. What can I do to solve this problem?

ANSWER: Read the 8th Habit by Stephen Covey.

QUESTION: I love counselling, motivating, advising etc, either on a career path, marital issues or any other topics. Also, I can teach(preach), I derive joy in doing them but I don't know how to go about these gifts. What exactly am I called to do on earth and how can I develop it?

ANSWER: Since you seem to be able to identify your strengths, then all you simply have to do now is express them. There are great individuals in these fields, listen to their tapes or read their books and do something that taps from your strengths for a minimum of an hour a day and watch yourself grow tremendously.

You can channel your purpose into public speaking and writing. You can use your Facebook page or group to deliver your content.

QUESTION: Why do we have more young writers committing suicide while the older writers are breathing the struggle?

ANSWER: Most of them started writing because they were told they can earn from it.

Not for the love of it or passion. Older writers kill boredom, and depression through writing, the writing was a healing to their aching heart, but to the present-day writers, it plunges them to loneliness and eventually suicide because it was to them a craft and it must pay. The squabbles are all the fall out of fail expectations.

QUESTION: What is the most important thing you think a man or woman should achieve or should have before seeing himself/herself ready for marriage?

ANSWER: Knowing what God created you to be, so as to find someone whose purpose and dreams align with yours.

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The Road To Success

8 Steps To Become Successful

The Road To Success; Don't walk it in this way

Short stories with lessons - How to become successful

When I was very young, I love to practice some funny stuff. There was a day I closed my eyes and started walking to see how possible it is to cope without eyes.

It is fun, and I was enjoying it.

After about 6 to 8 steps, I quickly opened my eyes to see if I am still on the right track. Then I closed my eyes again to explore the BLIND WORLD a little bit further.

As the saying goes; "a dog that will go astray will never hear the whistle of the hunter". Although, my ancestors have whispered in my ear that "stop this thing you are doing, you young boy", but I refused and disobeyed. 

As you can guess, after another 6 to 8 steps, I hit my forehead with the wall " GBOOOS!"

Lesson from the story

1.Find your vision before setting out on your success journey.

2.Don't allow ignorance to blindfold you

3.Take advice from superior minds

HOW TO BECOME SUCCESSFUL

Success isn't about big houses, expensive cars, or any other material things. You are not created just to go to school, get good grades, get good jobs, marry a wife/husband, give birth to kids, build houses, buy huge cars, get old, retire and die. NO! True success is all about the lives you impacted,  the ability to give to the less privileged, and the legacy you left even after you are gone. Success is about pursuing things that actually make a lasting difference.

You can become successful in any area of calling, but to achieve that, you must take action. No single factor guarantees achievement to one person but prevents it for another. When you focus on your goals, take steps and have a little faith in yourself, you can achieve noteworthy success.

All great men who made history had something in common which made them attain great height, and these are the major things listed and explained below:

STEPS TO BECOME SUCCESSFUL

1. Discover Your Vision

Vision is the ability to think about or plan the future with imagination or wisdom, It can be termed as 'far-sightedness.' Your vision defines who you want to be, what you want to be known for and the set of accomplishments you aim for. Your vision helps define the goals by giving you a framework to evaluate those goals.

Vision simplifies life and it controls your choices. Once you know where you are going, you also automatically know the road that won't take you there. This will make you focus on the most important things. Vision should be your source of motivation and that is why it is an important step for you to be successful in life.

Discovering your vision is a step you must not skip. You need to have the map of where

you want to be if you want to be successful, that 'map'  is your vision.

2. Belief In Yourself

Only what you believe is allowed to happen. Positive things are not exempted. And if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will. You need the right mindset to do so. You have to believe that you can do it to take the right steps toward the desired aim or plan. There are some qualities you need as an individual to position yourself for greatness in your area of calling, do not neglect the right attitudes which you need to travel your life journey successfully.

If you don't believe in your abilities you can never be successful in anything you lay your hands on. You may have been asking yourself within your mind that how can I be successful, or someone has come to you asking the question "what are the steps to become successful?" You should be aware that believing in yourself is one important factor that determines how far you can go.

3. Set Goals

Goal setting is the process of taking active steps to accomplish your desired result. Goal setting involves the development of an action plan created to motivate and guide a person or group toward a goal. Hence, setting goals means that an individual or group has committed thought, emotion, and attitude towards attaining the goal. In doing so, the goal setter has defined a desired future state which differs from their current state, thus organizing a mismatch which in turn stimulates future actions.

There are different types of goal setting, ranging from personal development goals, business goals, academic goals and other aspects of life. The bigger the goals, the more effort you will need to put forth to achieve those goals. However, do not forget the rules for goal setting which is SMARTA. The meaning of that acronym is stated below

S-SPECIFIC

M-MEASURABLE

A-ACHIEVABLE

R-REALISTIC

T-TIME BOUND

A- ALIGNMENT

Goal setting is one of the key elements of attaining noteworthy success. It is an elaborate topic that needs to be studied if you want to set achievable goals.

4. Be Disciplined

Discipline doesn't mean punishment or making ourselves do something we don’t want to. Discipline is what you may not like doing, but have the opportunity to do to get the results you would like to have.

You need the discipline to keep yourself moving forward and as well towards the life, you want to live during those times that don’t seem to be producing immediate results. Without discipline, successful life is not attainable.

Discipline is needed to back up goal-setting to accomplish the aims and objectives.

5. Develop Persistence

I am very sure that this is not the first time you will hear this statement "winners never quit", right?

You can't be aspiring to become successful and then you are afraid of failure. All successful men you see today have one or more times fail in one thing or the other, but they never give up on their dreams and that is why you see them winning today. Persistence is another thing you must have as an individual to become successful. If you try and fail, try again and again and again until you accomplish what you desired.

There are several real examples you and I know of very well, remember Abraham Lincoln, a one-time American president who tried several times before he won the elections as a president of the United States. Another man I won't do without mentioning is Thomas Edison who failed at several attempts when he was trying to create the light bulb we use today. If he did not persist, will he make it a reality? absolutely no!

6. Have Courage

You have to get courage, you need it to scale through the moments of fear of failure or danger. There are several risks you must be willing to take with the courage to get what you want. You need the courage to act outwardly on what you see inwardly. If you fail to do so you will end up regretting that you didn't take a bold step toward your desire. An how do you face challenges of life that may want you to quit due to fear? at that moment, you have to focus on your ability and not your weakness, if the I CANT mentality has overshadowed your ability, then you will not be able to take bold steps.

Courageous people are not concerned about the time it would take them to get what they want. What they are always concerned about is how to carry out their plan and other necessary things that must be put in place to give the result they want.

7. Live A Life Of Influence

If you ever want to be successful in life, you must strive to be a guide to others. If you can develop other people then you are truly a successful man or woman. Don't just build yourself and stay satisfied, build others as well and you will see your result multiplying rapidly.

What is influence?

Influence is the capacity to affect the character, development, or behaviour of someone or something, or the effect itself. This key step of becoming successful that I  mentioned is about the positive ones. I am not talking about the negative influences that have corrupted our society today such as people who train armed robbers, kidnappers and so many other negative businesses out there. Ensure the Impact you are trying to make is a positive one, because that is another key way of becoming truly successful.

If you notice the first statement in this write-up which says; Success isn't about big houses, expensive cars, or any other material things. Success is about the lives you impacted. Success is about pursuing things that actually make a lasting difference.

8. Obey Your Creator

Who is your creator?

God right?

You need to commit yourself to your creator and listen to his voice. He knows the plan he has for your life and he alone can direct you to the right path. If you disobey Gods command, your success is not a solid one even if you ever made It. He has given us a book full of promises and commandments. The reason God gave some commandments to us is due to his love for humanity, he wants us to live in peace and comfort. If you study the holy book very well, you will discover that God intends to make us come to him and enjoy the beauty of his love. And if anyone obeys him, such a person will receive God's grace to scale through life hurdles.

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The Struggles Of Our Life

Inspirational short stories with lessons - How to advance through adversity

Once upon a time, a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable and that she didn’t know how she was going to make it.

She was tired of fighting and struggling all the time. It seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.

Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire.

Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot and ground coffee beans in the third pot. He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to his daughter.

The daughter moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After twenty minutes he turned off the burners.

He took the potatoes out of the pot and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. He then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup.

Turning to her, he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?”

“Potatoes, eggs and coffee,” she quickly replied.

“Look closer,” he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noted that they were soft.

He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.

Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich flavour brought a smile to her face.

“Father, what does this mean?” she asked.

He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity (the boiling water). However, each one reacted differently. The potato went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.

The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.

However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.

“Which one are you?” he asked his daughter.

“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?”

Lessons from the story:

1. In life, things happen around us, things happen to us, but the only thing that truly matters is how you choose to react to it and what you make out of it.

2. Life is all about learning, adapting and transforming all the struggles that we experience into something positive.

HOW TO ADVANCE THROUGH ADVERSITY

Challenges are bound to occur in our journey through life. You must be aware that no difficulty is permanent. For you to advance in times of adversity, you need to develop the willpower not to give up. That is the assured way to overcome, if you don't give up, you will define win.

9 STEPS TO OVERCOME ADVERSITY

When adversity occurs in an individual's life, most people tend to look for the escape route. Withdrawing from adversity is not the best step to take. Whenever disaster struck against any individual, all he/she will want to do is to find an escape and avoid the disaster. Such a response to adversity shows that the individual is weak or has not developed personally.

There are two responses to adversity

1. The first one is to exclaim, "Life is so terrible" or "why me Lord?" and most times weak individuals will say "but you don't understand what I am going through." The issue of adversity is a personal one, and that is why many feel their situation is worse than anyone else's.

2. The second one is to think positively "if I can't pay the price, then I don't deserve the prize". And then such individuals position the mind to find the perfect solution to such a situation.

We may feel like a situation is too terrible and there is no solution to it but that is not true. There are ways we can approach unavoidable situations in our life. You must refuse to be discouraged. Below are the steps to overcoming adversity:

1. SPEAK POSITIVELY TO YOUR SITUATION

Each time the fear of failing grabs you, speak positive words aloud to that situation. Here are some positive affirmations to repeat regularly:

" all is well"

"I will conquer"

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"

"This is not the end of my life"

" I am unstoppable"

"I shall not grow weary" "I am unstoppable" 

2. SELF MOTIVATION

At times, we become overwhelmed by the issues we face every day. And when stress is becoming much, it leads to depression. And to avoid breaking down in this situation, you have to brace up and encourage yourself. Take a look at the goals you set that gives you hope. Colourfully view the future and encourage yourself with what you can accomplish. It is not a bad thing to fall, you only need to get up and start moving again when you fall.

3. THINK OUT OF THE BOX

If you address the situation with an emotional state, it will keep getting worse. That is why you need to detach yourself from the situation first and then you can think of the way out. You will agree with me that it is easier to show how somebody else can change the situation they are in. You can spot the ways they can get out of a situation in which they found themselves since you are not emotionally attached to the situation, and it is easier to look at the problem from a different and better perspective.

This doesn't mean that you should throw away the box. You don't need to throw away the box, you only need to think out of it. To overcome adversity in your life, detach yourself from the situation and look at it from a different perspective. Treat it as another man's case and you will find a solution to the problem.

4. FIND OUT THE CAUSE

Most times, the hardship or problems we find ourselves in are the outcomes of our past actions. If you can investigate the source of the crisis, it will help you to get the right solution to the problem.  Because to change your situation, you need to change your thought and actions, Henry Ford said 'If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.' Wrong decisions are part of the cause of adversity in our life. You must try to figure out the cause of the problem and Look into how to change that situation. Find a way to face and surpass the challenges that are holding you back from success. Never blame other people, the system, or the government for your misfortune.

5. DEVELOP RESILIENCE

Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties. It refers to the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events. Being resilient does not mean you won't experience stress, emotional upheaval, and suffering. Being able to recover readily from misfortune, tragedy, setback, or any other form of adversity. You need to be willing to try again after every fall. Instead of thinking of quitting, map out the plan of how to get back on track.

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”

― Maya Angelou

"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

― Thomas Edison

6. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE

Words from other people can affect the way we see situations. If all you got around you are people who always see doom in every circumstance, it will affect your progress, it will either prevent you from moving forward or reduce your ability, making the situation look harder.

But to save yourself, never move with people who always see impossibilities in every situation.

"Resilience isn’t a single skill. It’s a variety of skills and coping mechanisms. To bounce back from bumps in the road as well as failures, you should focus on emphasizing the positive.” 

― Jean Chatzky

7. INVEST IN YOURSELF

This sounds like a proverb, right? You may be asking that what do I mean by invest in yourself? Investing in yourself is all about spending as little or as much money to develop yourself. 

It is the ability to gather enough information about ways you can move from point A to point B and finally reach your goal. You will surely overcome adversity if you can develop yourself for the result you desired. Here are ways you can invest in yourself:

• Discover yourself.
• Read good books.
• Read blog posts that deals with what you intend to improve on.
• Develop new skills.
• Never stop learning (That is the number one key to success, however, learn only things that are important to your journey)

8. LINK UP WITH SUCCESS

Adversity is a barrier to success, and the only way you can scale through is to find the 'ladder' or 'bridge' that will help you get to your dream. BELIEVING IN YOUR ABILITY is one of the bridges, having FOCUS is one of them, setting and accomplishing GOALS, making the right CHOICES, can be the bridge you needed.

When limits are broken, adversity vanishes. This means that when you can link up with success with the right ladder, you won't fall.

9. FIND A MENTOR

There are key steps to finding the right mentor. You need a mentor especially for rapid growth in your career/ business. A mentor will guide, motivate and even share experiences with you. The importance can never be overemphasized.

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SILENCED!

 SILENCED!

Inspirational Short Stories with lessons - How to overcome the fear of threats and break free of danger.

"Would you keep quiet you silly brat!", he yelled at me. 

I kept struggling, kicking and cursing under my breath.

Irritated by my defence mechanisms, he silenced me with a thunderous slap. I felt intense pains on my cheeks but they were nothing compared to the pains I felt in between my thighs.

He forced himself into me amidst curses. It was more painful than the rest of the days. Perhaps that was my punishment for putting up a defence.

"When would all this end?", I wept silently as he made animalistic noises.

"If someone else gets to know about this,  I would kill you. Don't even try telling your mum unless you want her dead", he warned as he zipped up his pants.

I spat at him.

"Animal! I hate you".

He grinned and whistled as he left the room.

I had so much hatred for him. I wished I could kill him. 

Mum, an American-trained barrister would come home to see my eyes swollen due to prolonged weeping. She would probe me to open up to her but his threats kept me mute.

I just wished she would figure out that her husband, my step-dad has been forcing me into immoral acts with him.

"Christy, please talk to me. Why are you sad?", Mum would ask but I couldn't say a word.

Deep down I wanted to be free from his shackles, molestations and abuses yet I couldn't say a word to voice out my pain.

His threats were like a pin fastened to my throat. It seemed like my mouth was masked up with steel tape.

I needed salvation from my step dad's torment yet I couldn't voice out my pain.

Not until I made a decision...

That night he came to me as usual with his ropes ready to bind my hands so I wouldn't hinder the penetration.

I was prepared for him. I took out my knives from the pillow and threatened to cut him in bits.

We had struggled with the knives until his manly strength overpowered mine. He had his way into me. I sustained bruises and knife cuts due to our struggle.

That midnight, I banged on the door to mum's room. She was surprised to see me half-naked as I walked into the room.

 

"Christy! What is the matter with you?"

I looked at the devil in his pyjamas sleeping comfortably on the king-sized bed and I felt like using a knife to cut off his manly organ, roast it as meat and serve it to him as a meal.

"Christy talk to me", mum shouted.

I showed her the cuts on my body, the severe injuries in between my thighs and so many more.

She screamed in fright. 

"Who did this to my daughter?"

And I told her everything.

Artwork by ParentCo

She woke him up with a slap on his face. The beast was surprised to see my mum & I shedding tears. He saw my unclad body with all bruises visible. And then he knew the river has overflown.

He was arrested that midnight and beaten mercilessly by the human rights officials. Later on, he was prosecuted and given a life sentence.

Hmm...

That was how I got my freedom. I got tired of being silenced and I voiced out.

Many of us are like me.  We find ourselves in terrible pains, situations and challenges. We cry and crave for salvation yet we never open our mouth to tell our problems to God. We expect him to see our pains and troubles and come to our aid.

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; to him that knocketh it shall be opened Matthew 7:7-8 

Story Written by Julius Favour Vivian

Lessons from the story

1. Never keep mute when you are cheated. Most threats are fake, it is just to keep the victim mute.

2. If you don't ask for something, you may not receive it.

How to overcome the fear of threats and break free of danger.

Threats of violence can have serious impacts on your mental health. Some of the issues it creates include anxiety, fear, self-blame and lack of concentration. When you are vulnerable to danger, you may also experience physical issues like dizziness, nausea, loss of appetite, headaches, chest pains,

 and sleeplessness.

Threats can be in different forms, and each requires a different approach. You’ll often need to quickly evaluate the situation so you can determine how serious the threat is and the best way to address the issue. Any kind of threat is illegal, especially if it involves physical harm just like the story above.

Threats can either be credible or non-credible.

Credible Threat

This kind of threat is true, serious, and real. The person has the ability to carry out the threat if the victim finally discloses the matter.

Non-credible Threat

This kind of threat is not real, the person just wants to enslave the victim so as not to disclose the matter. Just like an illusion, it is false evidence appearing real.

When you are threatened by an individual close to you or even by a stranger, the way you react can vary from becoming aggressive to feeling fearful and unsure of what to do next. Be informed that the way you handle the issue can have a dangerous impact on your life.

Source: gettyimages

Here are steps you need to take whenever you want to break free of threat or you  found yourself in this kind of situation.

What To Do When Someone Threatens you

Stay calm whenever you’re dealing with a threat. When there is a problem,  it is easy to say things you shouldn’t.  and the last thing you want to do is create an evidence trail that could put some of the blame on you. Take it seriously but do not threaten back. Also, be very careful of putting any type of response in form of writing to the person.

Always think before you act, Avoid all things that can have severe, long-term consequences on you or those that are on your side.

Source: pexels

1.Have faith and believe that you will conquer

The way you see yourself in such a situation matters a lot. If you feel defeated within you, there is a problem. But if you can cheer yourself up that God will save you through an individual, you are on your way out of such a predicament. The more you allow fear to occupy your mind, the more difficult such situation will look like. Most threat based on assault is like a shield for the culprit to keep the victim mute and protect himself from punishment or loss of dignity.

2. Gather And Retain All evidence

Firm evidence is needed in this situation. To make it easier to get out of it and for people to believe you, make sure you hold onto all evidence From the moment the threat arises.

Things like messages, screenshots, and record of telephone conversation will be helpful if you need to take legal or civil action. If it happens to be a physical one, you may record the voice of such an individual if you got the opportunity to do so.

3. Tell Someone you trust

Make sure you talk to someone capable about what’s going on. Never deal with a threat on your own. Let he/she be aware of the person who is threatening you and show such person the evidence you have gathered. This should be done wisely. Once you are courageous enough to explain what has happened to someone without the knowledge of the individual who abused you, then you are at a higher edge to overcome the situation.

4. Make Peace 

If you feel the threat is a non-credible one, you may want to reach out to the person who is threatening you. See if you can resolve the issue amicably However, in many cases, this can make things worse. If you decide to take this approach, be cautious so that that step won't exacerbate the situation. Some threats can never be settled amicably due to the situation behind them.

Source: pexels

5. Take a Legal Action

But if the case is a severe one, that is a credible threat. It’s very important and highly recommend to take such threat seriously and do what you need to be on the safer side. If someone threatens you, do your best to remain calm and shrewdly report the case to the police or other law enforcement body dealing with such kind of issues.

Most times, the culprit may be arrested and such individual faces assault charges. This is usually a non-indictable offence, but if it’s serious, it could result in a jail term.

Be informed that some are threats are only empty threats and you only need to take courage and voice out to overcome the fear caused by that threat.

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The Young Female Reporter

The Young Female Reporter

Inspirational short stories with lessons; How to achieve your aim and desires

Source: Pexels

In 1995, I granted an interview with a newspaper in Singapore. The young female reporter was on time, and the interview got underway immediately. We sat in the lobby of a luxurious hotel, sipping coffee and discussing the purpose of my visit to Singapore. I was to share the platform with Zig Ziglar. He was speaking on motivation, and I was speaking on "The Secrets of the Rich."

"Someday, I would like to be a best-selling author like you," she said.

I had seen some of the articles she had written for the paper, and I was impressed. She had a tough, clear style of writing. Her articles held a reader's interest. "You have a great style," I said in reply.  "What holds you back from achieving your dream?"

"My work does not seem to go anywhere," she said quietly. "Everyone says that my novels are excellent, but nothing happens.  So I keep my job with the paper. At least it pays the bills. Do you have any suggestions?"

"Yes, I do," I said brightly.  "A friend of mine here in Singapore runs a school that trains people to sell. He runs sales-training courses for many of the top corporations here in Singapore, and I think attending one of his courses would greatly enhance your career."

She stiffened.  "Are you saying I should go to school to learn to sell?"

I nodded.

"You aren't serious, are you?"

Again, I nodded.  "What is wrong with that?" I was now back peddling. She was offended by something, and now I was wishing 11 had not said anything. In my attempt to be helpful, I found myself defending my suggestion.

"I have a master's degree in English Literature. Why would I go to school to learn to be a salesperson? I am a professional. I went to school to be trained in a profession so I would not have to be a salesperson. I hate salespeople. All they want is money. So tell me why| I should study sales?" She was now packing her briefcase forcibly. The interview was over.

On the coffee table sat a copy of an earlier best-selling book I wrote. I picked it up as well as the notes she had jotted down on her legal pad. "Do you see this?" I said pointing to her notes.

Source: Unsplash

She looked down at her notes.  "What," she said, confused.

Again, I pointed deliberately to her notes.  On her pad, she had written "Robert Kiyosaki, best-selling author." "It says 'best-selling author,' not best 'writing' author." Her eyes widened immediately.

"I am a terrible writer. You are a great writer. I went to sales school. You have a master's degree. Put them together and you get a 'best-selling author' and a 'best-writing author."

Anger flared from her eyes. "I'll never stoop so low as to learn how to sell. People like you have no business writing. I am a professionally trained writer and you are a salesman. It is not fair."

The rest of her notes were put away, and she hurried out through the large glass doors into the humid Singapore morning. 

At least she gave me a fair and favourable write-up the next morning.

As narrated by Robert T. Kiyosaki (Author of Rich Dad Poor Dad)

Brief Biography: Robert Toru Kiyosaki (born April 8, 1947) is an American businessman and author. Kiyosaki is the founder of Rich Global LLC and the Rich Dad Company, a private financial education company that provides personal finance and business education to people through books and videos.

Lessons from the story

1. Be open to learning

2. Don't be offended by good advice, rather think about the lessons

3. Great talent is not enough, learn as much as you can.

How to achieve your aim, goals, and desires

Source: Unsplash

Everything in life is all about the decision. If you win, it is as a result of your decision. And if you lose, it is the outcome of your decisions as well. Read on How-to- be-more_productive

1. Be teachable: If you want to be successful, you must keep growing. The best way to achieve your aim is to make yourself a continual learner. ''It is what you learn after you know it all that counts" ___John Wooden 
2. Build a great interest in learning things that will help you achieve your aims: Learning is not an activity that has a climax, it Is a lifelong pursuit. Your ego is the first thing you need to deal with if you ever want to be teachable. Feeling superior will never help matters because there is a thing you can learn from everyone whether young or old. Pride leads to a loss of desire to learn and an unwillingness to change. Pride often makes a person unteachable. And if you ever want to accomplish your aim, you must become teachable. Learn to listen to instructions, listen more than you talk. Listen openly for the truth, do not act defensive when criticized. never skip the learning process. 
3. Be disciplined: Discipline can be defined as making yourself do something when you could be doing something more pleasant. Start by taking small activities to make things better. Then you can be increasing the speed as you go on. Do the things that hurt you less, so as not to feel discouraged at first. Push yourself into discomfort a little bit, so you can get better at this over time.

   

   Source: Unsplash

   
   
4. Develop the habit of following decisions promptly: Don't try to back up your mistakes with a formidable array of excuses. A disciplined person won't neglect any issue that needs attention. "Discipline is doing what you really don't want to do so you can do what you really want to do." ___Jeff Fisher

   

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5. Work on your mindset: Make personal development a priority for yourself. This may take a little time because every individual is a product of nature and nurture. The beliefs and notions that every individual grew up with will surely affect the mindset. Your hands will only reach the things that you believe is possible. Doubts and false ideas can prevent anyone from achieving his aim. 

   

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6. Look at issues with a positive perception: Don't be an agent of doom. Instead of talking about why it cannot be done, think of ways it can be done. Your mind is the greatest tool that can help you achieve your aim. Work more on feeding it with information that will make it grow from a chicken mindset to a lion's mindset. Picture whatever you want in your mind and back it up with steadfast faith. The first determinant of your success is the mind. Once you can overcome the negative of your desire, you are 99% to getting it.
7. Be hungry for more: The greatest threat to being all you could be is satisfaction with who you are. Back to the story above, the young female reporter said "...so I keep my job with the paper, at least it pays the bills." It shows clearly that her desire to become a bestselling author didn't consume her. She just wants to play it safe. Although she was a great writer she lacks the right things to move to the next stage. She said, "everyone says that my novels are ex excellent, but nothing happens." If she wants something to happen, she must have a burning desire to achieve her aim. And if you have previous achievements, don't rely on your laurels. "Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying" ___Roy T. Bennett

   

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8. Be specific: Let your aim or goals be clear. Don't say, "I just want to make it." Pinpoint the exact thing you want. The goal statement should indicate what should be accomplished. It should be phrased using action words like "sell," "save, " "create," "build," "implement,"). If the goal is measurable and specific, you can determine if you have accomplished it. If the goal is accomplished, the project is a success. Suppose your objective is to raise capital for your proposed business. An example of a specific goal to help you meet this objective is: "I will save 240 dollars in two months by saving 4 dollars every day for 60 days.
9. Have a definite plan and deadline: You need to map out the exact way you want to do it. The step by step guides should be written down. And most importantly, create a deadline for that plan. Procrastination is one of the greatest causes of failure. Most times, it is not a lack of knowledge or skill that causes disappointment. It is a lack of focus and inability to make a prompt decision.

   

   Source: Unsplash

   
   
10. Persist: It is pertinent to understand that despite your great courage and hard work, you may need to 'refire.' The exact result you desire may not appear immediately. That should never be an excuse to stop shaking the tree of life. Persist and you will surely get down the fruit unheard of. If you keep trying, you will learn, grow and as well be whatever you want to be. If Micheal Jordan had stopped at the sight of failure when he first attempts basketball, He won't be noticed or ever called a great basketball player. He said;

"I can accept failure, everyone fails at something but I cannot accept not trying" ___Micheal Jordan

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